On Working Moms

Maybe it is appropriate that my 100th blog post is a rant.

Today, I saw something that nearly caused me to lose my schmidt.  It was an article about how stay-at-home-moms are doing God's work.  I've seen things like it before.  I'll be honest, I didn't even read it because it pissed me off so much.  I sort of glanced at it, and then vented my frustration to my girlfriends, sprinkling the "f" word here and there.  I do that sometimes.

There were several reasons for my frustration.  I was sitting in traffic while I read it (Yes, I Facebook and sit. I was not actually moving, so it's OK).  It was 6:40am.  Those were the first two reasons I became so irritated.  Neither of them are very significant.  I'm not a morning person.

One of the legitimate reasons this made me want to hit someone, is my hatred for people who have the "Look at Me!" mentality.  I'm pretty much a badass.  I do a lot of very noteworthy things on a daily basis.  But I don't need to go around broadcasting them.  It's not polite to brag.  People who brag (to people who don't care) always seem to be seeking affirmation that they are doing something good.  Notice I qualified that statement--I can brag with the best of them.  The SAHM who constantly has to remind everyone that she is a SAHM, and she homeschools her kids, and she makes all of their food from things she grew organically in her yard, and she knitted their cloth diapers from hand-spun wool that she sheared from the sheep she raised... What the hell is she trying to prove?  Is she trying to justify the fact that she has no job?  Does she need to remind the world that being a Mom is a job?  I don't get it.  "Everyone look!  I am insecure about my contribution to society, so I feel the need to remind you all that I fulfill my obligation to the kids *I* made!! It's a job!!"

The second reason this made me very VERY stabby, is that working moms are still MOMS.  I still wipe my kid's ass.  I still wash all of her damn clothes.  I still kiss boo-boos.  I still have to instill values in her.  I still have to say "No!" A THOUSAND times because she won't just. stop. playing. in the. damn. dog. bowl.  Yes, there are those nine hours each day when someone else cares for her.  Oddly?  They charge me to do it.  Because I want to make a second mortgage payment to my kid's day care--which is not far off.  The months that have five Mondays?  Day care actually costs more than the mortgage.  No shit.  My kid's teachers do love her, though.  You know what else they loved?  When they got to see her crawl for the first time while I was at work.  That was an awesome day.

So to wrap up this rant...kiss my ass, SAHM.  I do every bit as much work as you, and I have to spend 40 hours a week earning a living.  And as as bonus, day care sends home a lovely virus with my child about once a month, so I get to be sick too!!  And when she's sick?  She can't go to day care!! ...but I sure as shit still have to pay for a full week.

[Editor's note: I don't mean all SAHMs.  I mean that SAHM.]

You can also see this blog if you have any doubts about whether or not it sucks to be a working Mom.