I know I haven't posted "O" yet. It's not because I don't have a post. It's because it's a good one, and I'm still working on it. I would be working on it now, but I'm watching hockey. Which leads me to my "P."
I HATE the Philadelphia Flyers.
That is all. See you tomorrow, with an "O" and, hopefully, a "Q."
Wednesday, April 18, 2012
Monday, April 16, 2012
N is for Non-Participant: an Open Letter
Dear American Sports Fan,
Sometimes, I fear that you have an unrealistic perspective about your position on the team. Specifically, that you don't have one. As strongly as you may feel that you belong to the team, you don't. Therefore, you should not take it as a personal insult when your team trades or releases a player. The management didn't do it to piss you off. They did it because they felt it was best for the team--your team. Maybe wait and see how it pans out before you start spewing your hatred for those "fucking morons" who "have no idea what they're doing."
Occasionally, a player will opt to sign with another team. While you have every right to think that player is a Total Douche, [*cough* Pujols! *cough*] he didn't "do" anything to you. Players are seldom loyal to anything except their own wallets. Hines Ward may be the exception. Also, Brett Favre. He didn't want to stop playing for Green Bay. He wanted to skip Spring Training because the dude is OLD. I don't blame him.
Sometimes, I fear that you have an unrealistic perspective about your position on the team. Specifically, that you don't have one. As strongly as you may feel that you belong to the team, you don't. Therefore, you should not take it as a personal insult when your team trades or releases a player. The management didn't do it to piss you off. They did it because they felt it was best for the team--your team. Maybe wait and see how it pans out before you start spewing your hatred for those "fucking morons" who "have no idea what they're doing."
Occasionally, a player will opt to sign with another team. While you have every right to think that player is a Total Douche, [*cough* Pujols! *cough*] he didn't "do" anything to you. Players are seldom loyal to anything except their own wallets. Hines Ward may be the exception. Also, Brett Favre. He didn't want to stop playing for Green Bay. He wanted to skip Spring Training because the dude is OLD. I don't blame him.
I hope I have cleared some things up for you today. Perhaps in the future you can apply this letter when you feel the need to say things like, "Don't come at me talking crap about my boys. I will fight you." The "crap" he was talking was "the truth" about a couple of dirty hits by James Neal of the Pittsburgh Penguins (MY team). They were dirty hits. I saw it myself. He should have been ejected. But it doesn't make me feel the need to fight anyone.
Thank you for your time,
Tara
Saturday, April 14, 2012
M is for Mature
When I was pregnant with Macy, I had to put away a lot of my clothes. I hadn't had a chance to go back through them until recently. What I found was a little... discouraging? Maybe that's not the word. It did lead to cleansing, though--one that was much-needed.
As I sorted through my denim mini skirts and spaghetti-strap tops, I just kept thinking, "Wow, I am way too old to be wearing this crap." I don't feel that old. Some of them were too small, but I mostly just felt like I am just too....something to wear that kind of stuff anymore. I guess the only word I can use to describe that feeling is "mature." I'm not too old or too fat... I'm too mature to dress like I did when I was 22. So, I broke down and bought some new clothes.
And I discovered was that there are clothes that look good on me--despite the fact that I think I could stand to lose another 20 pounds. However, none of those clothes are located in the juniors department. They aren't modified by the words "low rise." I think I have been shopping for the wrong clothes for years. This is one of the dresses I bought.
Age appropriate, right? Professional, even. I have actually bought 5 dresses over the last few weeks, and I plan to continue expanding my wardrobe. Who knew all it took was shopping in the women's department instead of the girls'?
As I sorted through my denim mini skirts and spaghetti-strap tops, I just kept thinking, "Wow, I am way too old to be wearing this crap." I don't feel that old. Some of them were too small, but I mostly just felt like I am just too....something to wear that kind of stuff anymore. I guess the only word I can use to describe that feeling is "mature." I'm not too old or too fat... I'm too mature to dress like I did when I was 22. So, I broke down and bought some new clothes.
And I discovered was that there are clothes that look good on me--despite the fact that I think I could stand to lose another 20 pounds. However, none of those clothes are located in the juniors department. They aren't modified by the words "low rise." I think I have been shopping for the wrong clothes for years. This is one of the dresses I bought.
Age appropriate, right? Professional, even. I have actually bought 5 dresses over the last few weeks, and I plan to continue expanding my wardrobe. Who knew all it took was shopping in the women's department instead of the girls'?
L is for Lawyers
I considered posting about my favorite TV shows, but there would be too many. I'm sort of a TV junkie. So I'll just post about a couple of them.
One of my long-time favorite shows is Law & Order: SVU. I don't like the other Law & Orders. Just the sex-crimes one. There are way too many character changes on regular Law & Order, and I'm always found Vincent D'Onofrio a little bit intense on Law & Order: Criminal Intent. So I only watch SVU. Fortunately, USA network runs plenty of re-runs. I record them all, despite the fact that I have seen every episode multiple times. I'm one of those people who constantly has the TV on for the background noise. I'm familiar enough with the episodes to miss big chunks and still be able to follow along. I will say, I'm not too thrilled about the recent character changes. I guess I'll have to get over that.
Last Summer, USA debuted one of their original shows called Suits. I'm addicted. It's about lawyers. Well, 1 lawyer. The other guy isn't a lawyer, but he's a genius, and he works as a lawyer. I think the show is brilliant. Years of watching SVU have *obviously* given me an extensive knowledge of the criminal justice system in our country. Suits takes it to the next level. There is a Bazinga in every episode... and it doesn't hurt that Gabriel Macht is totally hot.
One of my long-time favorite shows is Law & Order: SVU. I don't like the other Law & Orders. Just the sex-crimes one. There are way too many character changes on regular Law & Order, and I'm always found Vincent D'Onofrio a little bit intense on Law & Order: Criminal Intent. So I only watch SVU. Fortunately, USA network runs plenty of re-runs. I record them all, despite the fact that I have seen every episode multiple times. I'm one of those people who constantly has the TV on for the background noise. I'm familiar enough with the episodes to miss big chunks and still be able to follow along. I will say, I'm not too thrilled about the recent character changes. I guess I'll have to get over that.
Last Summer, USA debuted one of their original shows called Suits. I'm addicted. It's about lawyers. Well, 1 lawyer. The other guy isn't a lawyer, but he's a genius, and he works as a lawyer. I think the show is brilliant. Years of watching SVU have *obviously* given me an extensive knowledge of the criminal justice system in our country. Suits takes it to the next level. There is a Bazinga in every episode... and it doesn't hurt that Gabriel Macht is totally hot.
K is for Kleenex
I have some sort of sinus thing or upper-respiratory thing. I'll spare you the details. Just know there is a lot of mucous and sneezing. I'm sure it was a gift from my Cupcake... something she picked up at day care.
I have about 8 boxes of Kleenex distributed throughout the house. They each contained approximately 3 Kleenexes.
I'm down to using toilet paper. This thing needs to pass quickly.
I have about 8 boxes of Kleenex distributed throughout the house. They each contained approximately 3 Kleenexes.
I'm down to using toilet paper. This thing needs to pass quickly.
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
J is for Junkie
I enjoy a nice episode of Intervention. Not the ones with the drunks or the coke-heads. I really like the ones where they shoot something up. Usually it's herion. Sometimes, meth. Either way, I have a weird fascination with watching these junkies sell themselves for drugs and spiral deeper out of control. I could actually do without the intervention part. Just show me how much better my life is than someone else's. This is also the reason I enjoy My Strange Addiction.
But I'm a Junkie too...
My name is Tara, and I'm an online-shop-a-holic. It started with Amazon.com. Because, seriously, you can buy ANYTHING on Amazon! Then, I bought an Amazon Prime membership...now I can buy anything AND get it in 2 days--without paying shipping!! Oh, and they also have free Amazon Video streaming for Prime Members. You complete me, Amazon!!
Another favorite of mine is Kohls.com. I enjoy their store too, but sometimes Macy doesn't feel like shopping. Kohl's is great because they do Kohl's cash...so, for buying something I would have bought anyway...I get $10 to spend later. Um, yes please? Let's not forget that their stuff is ALWAYS on sale.
Rounding out my Top 3 is BathandBodyWorks.com. A few years back, they started selling their retired signature collection scents online. Amazing! I really can't make it through the summer without some Cool Citrus Basil. I hope they continue to do this for years to come!
Probably the best thing about shopping online is coming home from work and finding presents on my porch from the UPS man. Does anyone else enjoy online shopping maybe a little too much?
But I'm a Junkie too...
My name is Tara, and I'm an online-shop-a-holic. It started with Amazon.com. Because, seriously, you can buy ANYTHING on Amazon! Then, I bought an Amazon Prime membership...now I can buy anything AND get it in 2 days--without paying shipping!! Oh, and they also have free Amazon Video streaming for Prime Members. You complete me, Amazon!!
Another favorite of mine is Kohls.com. I enjoy their store too, but sometimes Macy doesn't feel like shopping. Kohl's is great because they do Kohl's cash...so, for buying something I would have bought anyway...I get $10 to spend later. Um, yes please? Let's not forget that their stuff is ALWAYS on sale.
Rounding out my Top 3 is BathandBodyWorks.com. A few years back, they started selling their retired signature collection scents online. Amazing! I really can't make it through the summer without some Cool Citrus Basil. I hope they continue to do this for years to come!
Probably the best thing about shopping online is coming home from work and finding presents on my porch from the UPS man. Does anyone else enjoy online shopping maybe a little too much?
I is for iPod
I is for iPod
I remember cassette tapes. I remember my baby sister pulling all the tape out because it was a fun game. I remember when the tape player would "eat" the tape. These are things my kid will never experience... because they don't make cassette any more. Also, because she has her own iPod. Spoiled? Maybe.
But this post is actually about the music I have been listening to lately, not about the ridiculously-age-inappropriate things I have bought for my 11-month-old.
We Are Young by Fun featuring Janelle Monae. Also known as "The Chevy Song." I love this song.
One Man Wrecking Machine by Guster. This one is several years old--it's from 2006. I heard (noticed) it for the first time while I was watching Disturbia the other day.
I Like it Like That by Hot Chelle Rae.
Yes, I fucking love Hot Chelle Rae. I'm not ashamed. I also love Avril Lavigne, but that's a subject for another post. Judge me if you want. This is what I have been listening to lately.
I remember cassette tapes. I remember my baby sister pulling all the tape out because it was a fun game. I remember when the tape player would "eat" the tape. These are things my kid will never experience... because they don't make cassette any more. Also, because she has her own iPod. Spoiled? Maybe.
But this post is actually about the music I have been listening to lately, not about the ridiculously-age-inappropriate things I have bought for my 11-month-old.
We Are Young by Fun featuring Janelle Monae. Also known as "The Chevy Song." I love this song.
One Man Wrecking Machine by Guster. This one is several years old--it's from 2006. I heard (noticed) it for the first time while I was watching Disturbia the other day.
I Like it Like That by Hot Chelle Rae.
Yes, I fucking love Hot Chelle Rae. I'm not ashamed. I also love Avril Lavigne, but that's a subject for another post. Judge me if you want. This is what I have been listening to lately.
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
H is for High School
I'm feeling rant-y today. I apologize in advance.
I'm not a teacher. I'm not a nanny. I didn't sign up to take care of children. Rather, I run a day care center for grown-ass adults. It's ludicrous, really.
At one point in my life, I acted like I was in high school. I spread rumors. I took things too personally. I got my feelings hurt over things that didn't really matter. Eventually, I realized that those things didn't matter. I grew up. I don't know when it happened, but it did. Don't get me wrong. I love some good gossip, but now I try to keep it among my close group of friends. I don't air my dirty laundry--particularly not at work.
I'm in the military. One would typically think that my work environment should stay professional most of the time. I wish. I can't go more than a day without someone tattling on her co-worker. I have had to listen in on countless conversations where a supervisor has to tell a subordinate not to talk about others. "Don't bring your business to work." "Don't worry about what so-and-so is doing. You're not her boss."
It's exhausting.
I used to give lectures. Really good lectures that totally would have worked on 17-year-old me. But these people are not me. If they were, they wouldn't need to receive these lectures at age 26 (not kidding). They would just come to work and do their damn jobs. So I have given up on lectures. I don't have the energy to care about people who really don't seem to care enough to help themselves. The only response I could muster today was, "Does it affect you in any way if she is five minutes late? Do you have to work five minutes longer if she's not on time? THEN DON'T FUCKING WORRY ABOUT HER."
My job makes me long to come home to my actual baby. She is better behaved than these adult "kids" I work with.
I'm not a teacher. I'm not a nanny. I didn't sign up to take care of children. Rather, I run a day care center for grown-ass adults. It's ludicrous, really.
At one point in my life, I acted like I was in high school. I spread rumors. I took things too personally. I got my feelings hurt over things that didn't really matter. Eventually, I realized that those things didn't matter. I grew up. I don't know when it happened, but it did. Don't get me wrong. I love some good gossip, but now I try to keep it among my close group of friends. I don't air my dirty laundry--particularly not at work.
I'm in the military. One would typically think that my work environment should stay professional most of the time. I wish. I can't go more than a day without someone tattling on her co-worker. I have had to listen in on countless conversations where a supervisor has to tell a subordinate not to talk about others. "Don't bring your business to work." "Don't worry about what so-and-so is doing. You're not her boss."
It's exhausting.
I used to give lectures. Really good lectures that totally would have worked on 17-year-old me. But these people are not me. If they were, they wouldn't need to receive these lectures at age 26 (not kidding). They would just come to work and do their damn jobs. So I have given up on lectures. I don't have the energy to care about people who really don't seem to care enough to help themselves. The only response I could muster today was, "Does it affect you in any way if she is five minutes late? Do you have to work five minutes longer if she's not on time? THEN DON'T FUCKING WORRY ABOUT HER."
My job makes me long to come home to my actual baby. She is better behaved than these adult "kids" I work with.
Sunday, April 8, 2012
G is for Girl Crush
A "Girl Crush" is something that has only recently been defined. I used to just wonder why I was completely fascinated by certain women, even though I still *totally* like boys.
Growing up, I watched a lot of Baywatch *hangs head in shame.* I blame that on my brother. Either way, my first Celebrity Girl Crush was on Nicole Eggert. I think I wanted to be her. Or maybe I just wanted boobs--mine didn't grow in until I was abooooout 19.
Now, I have 3 Celebrity Girl Crushes. They are much more respectable than this first one.
I have loved Angie Harmon since I first started watching Law & Order. I just want to listen to her talk. Also, I wouldn't be upset if I could look like her. My Girl Crush was realized with the debut of Rizzoli and Isles on TNT. I mean, seriously, how can you not think she's a badass?
Growing up, I watched a lot of Baywatch *hangs head in shame.* I blame that on my brother. Either way, my first Celebrity Girl Crush was on Nicole Eggert. I think I wanted to be her. Or maybe I just wanted boobs--mine didn't grow in until I was abooooout 19.
Now, I have 3 Celebrity Girl Crushes. They are much more respectable than this first one.
Angie Harmon
I have loved Angie Harmon since I first started watching Law & Order. I just want to listen to her talk. Also, I wouldn't be upset if I could look like her. My Girl Crush was realized with the debut of Rizzoli and Isles on TNT. I mean, seriously, how can you not think she's a badass?
Christina Applegate
She has come a long way since Kelly Bundy. I mean.... sooooo skanky. But now? Soooo pretty!! I am a huge Friends fan, and her character (Rachel's sister, Amy) was hilarious. I loved her in Anchorman. I want to be her in Up All Night. I, too, am addicted to being fancy.
Emma Stone
Emma Stone is a breathtakingly beautiful ginger. I hope my baby grows up to be this beautiful. She was amazing in Easy A. Aaaaand that scene in Crazy Stupid Love when she passes out next to Ryan Gosling? I totally wanted them to do it... I can't believe I even said that. I'm really not one to root for another woman to sleep with my future husband. I mean, Hey Girl...
And while we're off topic...
Oh, and one last thing.
THIS is how much I love Emma Stone!
F is for Family Friendly
I'm not talking about wholesome atmospheres where swear words don't float on the breeze.
I'm talking about drive-thrus. Seriously.
I thought drive-thrus were invented by lazy people. Really, they were invented by moms. There are so many times when I will choose convenience over something I want more, or something that is cheaper. The other day, I really wanted a burrito from Chipotle. Like, badly. I love Chipotle. But Macy was with me, and we had just left Kohl's, which meant I had just fought the epic battle that is strapping her into the car seat. Chipotle would have meant reliving that battle, or toting 40 pounds of car seat and baby through the line. I had Arby's.
Steam-in-bag vegetables are another example. They are expensive. But they are just. so. easy. No dishes. No waiting for water to boil. Just toss them in and 5 minutes later I have a delicious bag of broccoli that I can sprinkle some salt on and eat directly from the bag. Wait... what?! Of course I never do that.
So when you see that "Customer with Child" parking spot at Harris Teeter--which is the only place I've ever seen it--please don't park there unless you have kids, you jackass.
I'm talking about drive-thrus. Seriously.
I thought drive-thrus were invented by lazy people. Really, they were invented by moms. There are so many times when I will choose convenience over something I want more, or something that is cheaper. The other day, I really wanted a burrito from Chipotle. Like, badly. I love Chipotle. But Macy was with me, and we had just left Kohl's, which meant I had just fought the epic battle that is strapping her into the car seat. Chipotle would have meant reliving that battle, or toting 40 pounds of car seat and baby through the line. I had Arby's.
Steam-in-bag vegetables are another example. They are expensive. But they are just. so. easy. No dishes. No waiting for water to boil. Just toss them in and 5 minutes later I have a delicious bag of broccoli that I can sprinkle some salt on and eat directly from the bag. Wait... what?! Of course I never do that.
So when you see that "Customer with Child" parking spot at Harris Teeter--which is the only place I've ever seen it--please don't park there unless you have kids, you jackass.
Friday, April 6, 2012
E is for Emergency...or Easter Miracle
I ended up off work today due to a child care debacle--darn! I missed a lot of unwanted excitement.
A little after noon, an F/A-18D Hornet from the squadron where I work crash-landed in Virginia Beach. The area where the plane crashed was only a few miles from the runway where it took off. The two pilots--one a student, one a veteran instructor--both ejected from the plane, landing just a short distance from where the jet crashed. I watched news coverage for most of the afternoon. You can see the local news coverage here, or you can just check any news station. The crash was the top story on national news tonight.
There are a few things I find amazing about this. As of right now, there were no fatalities. Virginia Beach is the most populous city in the state. This week is Spring Break. The fact that this jet went down without taking a single life is a true miracle. There were seven injured, none of them serious. Wow.
Something one of the pilots said brought tears to my eyes. When a resident of the apartment complex where the pilot's plane crashed came to the pilot's aid, the first thing he said was "I'm sorry I destroyed your home." I don't know why that had such an impact on me, but it really hit me hard. Such a strange and selfless first reaction. And it was almost like he knew that no lives were lost when that plane hit the ground. Additionally, the location where the pilots landed indicated that they stayed with the aircraft as long as they could to try to recover it. The ejected moments before it hit the ground. I believe they did their damnedest to minimize the impact.
Good Friday, indeed.
A little after noon, an F/A-18D Hornet from the squadron where I work crash-landed in Virginia Beach. The area where the plane crashed was only a few miles from the runway where it took off. The two pilots--one a student, one a veteran instructor--both ejected from the plane, landing just a short distance from where the jet crashed. I watched news coverage for most of the afternoon. You can see the local news coverage here, or you can just check any news station. The crash was the top story on national news tonight.
There are a few things I find amazing about this. As of right now, there were no fatalities. Virginia Beach is the most populous city in the state. This week is Spring Break. The fact that this jet went down without taking a single life is a true miracle. There were seven injured, none of them serious. Wow.
Something one of the pilots said brought tears to my eyes. When a resident of the apartment complex where the pilot's plane crashed came to the pilot's aid, the first thing he said was "I'm sorry I destroyed your home." I don't know why that had such an impact on me, but it really hit me hard. Such a strange and selfless first reaction. And it was almost like he knew that no lives were lost when that plane hit the ground. Additionally, the location where the pilots landed indicated that they stayed with the aircraft as long as they could to try to recover it. The ejected moments before it hit the ground. I believe they did their damnedest to minimize the impact.
Good Friday, indeed.
Thursday, April 5, 2012
D is for Diving In
I'm out of shape. Seriously out of shape. Not too much with the "overweight," but definitely with the "unable to do sit-ups."
When I think about getting into shape, it makes me angry--for a couple of reasons.
1. I HATE!!! running. With a burning passion. The only good reason to run anywhere, is that something is chasing you. I hate it. I wish I could be one of those people who runs marathons for fun, but that's not me.
2. I hate being told what to do. I.E. when the Navy mandates that I maintain a certain level of physical fitness, and work out a certain number of times a week. It pisses me off. I don't think my job should be allowed to regulate my body weight or how many push-ups I can do. Thus, I am resistant to work out because I am required to do so by my job.
In trying to overcome both of those things, I have decided to go back to swimming. This area has a ridiculous number of indoor pools, including one close to work, which allows me to go during lunch--yess!! I have also purchased a membership to a local recreation center that is very close to my house. Tomorrow morning will be my second day in the pool. I really enjoyed my swim yesterday, and I hope I am able to keep it up. I'm not so good with the dieting, and I would really like to wear shorts this summer!
When I think about getting into shape, it makes me angry--for a couple of reasons.
1. I HATE!!! running. With a burning passion. The only good reason to run anywhere, is that something is chasing you. I hate it. I wish I could be one of those people who runs marathons for fun, but that's not me.
2. I hate being told what to do. I.E. when the Navy mandates that I maintain a certain level of physical fitness, and work out a certain number of times a week. It pisses me off. I don't think my job should be allowed to regulate my body weight or how many push-ups I can do. Thus, I am resistant to work out because I am required to do so by my job.
In trying to overcome both of those things, I have decided to go back to swimming. This area has a ridiculous number of indoor pools, including one close to work, which allows me to go during lunch--yess!! I have also purchased a membership to a local recreation center that is very close to my house. Tomorrow morning will be my second day in the pool. I really enjoyed my swim yesterday, and I hope I am able to keep it up. I'm not so good with the dieting, and I would really like to wear shorts this summer!
Tuesday, April 3, 2012
C is for Chambourcin
MMMMmmmmm. Wine.
I'm a wino. Meaning, I like me some wine. I'm definitely no connoisseur. I'm not even what you would call "classy." During one particular wine trailing trip, I chewed on the wax from the outside of a block of fancy cheese. I tried it multiple times. I insisted it was cheese-flavored bubble gum. CLASSY.
But Chambourcin. Soooo delicious. I feel bad getting drunk on Chambourcin because I don't fully enjoy each glass.
Chambourcin is a hybrid grape. It was created by some French guy whose name I can't remember. The word Chambourcin is French for "I'm made of pure fucking awesomeness." Or maybe it means something else. Whatever. It IS made of awesome.
My favorite Chambourcin is an amazing wine called Papa's Rosa from my absolute favorite winery, Blue Sky Vineyard. You should all make a trip to the So Ill and visit this place. I would live there if it wouldn't bankrupt me while simultaneously giving me cirrhosis. Papa's Rosa makes me happy. It makes my tummy nice and warm. Maybe I've already had a few glasses. Who knows? But I feel it is my duty to tell the world about the most amazing grape ever cloned in a lab--Chambourcin (Also, that cloning thing might be totally made up).
I'm a wino. Meaning, I like me some wine. I'm definitely no connoisseur. I'm not even what you would call "classy." During one particular wine trailing trip, I chewed on the wax from the outside of a block of fancy cheese. I tried it multiple times. I insisted it was cheese-flavored bubble gum. CLASSY.
But Chambourcin. Soooo delicious. I feel bad getting drunk on Chambourcin because I don't fully enjoy each glass.
Chambourcin is a hybrid grape. It was created by some French guy whose name I can't remember. The word Chambourcin is French for "I'm made of pure fucking awesomeness." Or maybe it means something else. Whatever. It IS made of awesome.
My favorite Chambourcin is an amazing wine called Papa's Rosa from my absolute favorite winery, Blue Sky Vineyard. You should all make a trip to the So Ill and visit this place. I would live there if it wouldn't bankrupt me while simultaneously giving me cirrhosis. Papa's Rosa makes me happy. It makes my tummy nice and warm. Maybe I've already had a few glasses. Who knows? But I feel it is my duty to tell the world about the most amazing grape ever cloned in a lab--Chambourcin (Also, that cloning thing might be totally made up).
B is for Boogeyman
I was never afraid of the Boogeyman when I was a kid. Monsters under the bed? Um, yes. Not monsters, but escaped convicts, actually. I was safe from them as long as none of my limbs ever ventured over the side of the bed. The escaped convicts might grab me. Maybe that has something to do with the fact that I grew up less than two miles from Leavenworth Federal Penitentiary. But I digress...
Aside from being yanked under the bed by a murderer who somehow went unnoticed in a prison break, I am still afraid of the same three things at 28 that I feared at 8.
1. Spiders. I have shivers just talking about them. I can feel them crawling on me. Nasty. I don't know why, but I'm terrified. Nothing makes me teenage-girl-shriek like pulling back a shower curtain or picking up a dirty shirt and finding one of these little suckers. It's all I can do to stomp on one. I once found a wolf spider in a laundry basket. In a moment of insanity, I decided to catch it in a jar and Google it so I would know if the eggs it had surely lain inside my ear canal while I was sleeping would hatch into poisonous baby spiders, or just the kind that would eat my brain (it was non-poisonous). I then took it outside to smoosh it. I had to fling the jar to get it to come out. And then I couldn't find it. And I felt like it was crawling on me for, like, three days. Awful.
2. The Dark. Yeah, I'm serious. I'm nearly 3 decades old, and I'm afraid of the dark. I'm not really afraid to be in the dark, I'm just afraid to walk into a dark room. I don't sleep with a light light or anything, but I have to turn on a light in order to walk into a room. I don't know what I am afraid might be in there. Maybe one of those murderers followed me all the way to the East Coast. I'm still funny about dangling my appendages over the side of the bed, too.
3. Throwing Up. I will do anything... A.Ny.Thing. to avoid vomiting. Even if I know I would feel better afterwards. I don't care. I will be miserable and suffer with abdominal cramps for 12 hours before I will spend 12 minutes puking. I had a record going of 3 years puke free, until my daughter so graciously decided to bring home the stomach flu from day care back in February. Yuck.
So, yeah. I'm a big chicken. Anyone else afraid of something that an adult should fear?
Aside from being yanked under the bed by a murderer who somehow went unnoticed in a prison break, I am still afraid of the same three things at 28 that I feared at 8.
1. Spiders. I have shivers just talking about them. I can feel them crawling on me. Nasty. I don't know why, but I'm terrified. Nothing makes me teenage-girl-shriek like pulling back a shower curtain or picking up a dirty shirt and finding one of these little suckers. It's all I can do to stomp on one. I once found a wolf spider in a laundry basket. In a moment of insanity, I decided to catch it in a jar and Google it so I would know if the eggs it had surely lain inside my ear canal while I was sleeping would hatch into poisonous baby spiders, or just the kind that would eat my brain (it was non-poisonous). I then took it outside to smoosh it. I had to fling the jar to get it to come out. And then I couldn't find it. And I felt like it was crawling on me for, like, three days. Awful.
2. The Dark. Yeah, I'm serious. I'm nearly 3 decades old, and I'm afraid of the dark. I'm not really afraid to be in the dark, I'm just afraid to walk into a dark room. I don't sleep with a light light or anything, but I have to turn on a light in order to walk into a room. I don't know what I am afraid might be in there. Maybe one of those murderers followed me all the way to the East Coast. I'm still funny about dangling my appendages over the side of the bed, too.
3. Throwing Up. I will do anything... A.Ny.Thing. to avoid vomiting. Even if I know I would feel better afterwards. I don't care. I will be miserable and suffer with abdominal cramps for 12 hours before I will spend 12 minutes puking. I had a record going of 3 years puke free, until my daughter so graciously decided to bring home the stomach flu from day care back in February. Yuck.
So, yeah. I'm a big chicken. Anyone else afraid of something that an adult should fear?
Monday, April 2, 2012
A is for Adjustments
It's really April? Seriously? *sigh*
I have been planning to participate in the A to Z challenge. I didn't realize we were actually going to start on a Sunday, because I remembered Sundays were the only no-blog days. So I'm a day late. Story of my life. Maybe that fits in with my post.
Adjustments. No one has ever accused me of being flexible. That is probably true of most Obsessive Compulsives. I like plans. I like order. I heart organization.
I don't like change. I knew things would change when I had a baby. I also thought I knew that eventually I would adjust to my "New Normal."
I never knew my New Normal would pretty much be total chaos. I don't handle that well, as you can imagine. That is a big reason why I can't seem to find time to blog. When I get Macy in bed at night, or when I have a day off with some downtime, I immediately think of all the chores I need to do. The kitchen needs to be mopped because OMG IT'S FILTHY! There is ALWAYS a load of laundry to do. I need to sort through Macy's clothes. I need to sort through my clothes. I need to go through my coupon binder and purge the expired ones. I need to plan next week's menu. I need to pay the bills. I need to sweep up the dog hair that coats every surface in my house. Shit! How did I forget I was supposed to re-organize the linen closet?!
And it goes on and on. And here I am. My kitchen floor is disgusting. My dog is trying to dig his eyes out of his head because of all the pollen. I didn't stop at the grocery store on my way home from work because I just didn't feel like it. I don't have anything planned for dinner.
But I wrote a blog. A blog that should have been written yesterday. Considering how the rest of this day has gone, I think that's an accomplishment. Now back to my regularly-scheduled chaos.
I have been planning to participate in the A to Z challenge. I didn't realize we were actually going to start on a Sunday, because I remembered Sundays were the only no-blog days. So I'm a day late. Story of my life. Maybe that fits in with my post.
Adjustments. No one has ever accused me of being flexible. That is probably true of most Obsessive Compulsives. I like plans. I like order. I heart organization.
I don't like change. I knew things would change when I had a baby. I also thought I knew that eventually I would adjust to my "New Normal."
I never knew my New Normal would pretty much be total chaos. I don't handle that well, as you can imagine. That is a big reason why I can't seem to find time to blog. When I get Macy in bed at night, or when I have a day off with some downtime, I immediately think of all the chores I need to do. The kitchen needs to be mopped because OMG IT'S FILTHY! There is ALWAYS a load of laundry to do. I need to sort through Macy's clothes. I need to sort through my clothes. I need to go through my coupon binder and purge the expired ones. I need to plan next week's menu. I need to pay the bills. I need to sweep up the dog hair that coats every surface in my house. Shit! How did I forget I was supposed to re-organize the linen closet?!
And it goes on and on. And here I am. My kitchen floor is disgusting. My dog is trying to dig his eyes out of his head because of all the pollen. I didn't stop at the grocery store on my way home from work because I just didn't feel like it. I don't have anything planned for dinner.
But I wrote a blog. A blog that should have been written yesterday. Considering how the rest of this day has gone, I think that's an accomplishment. Now back to my regularly-scheduled chaos.
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